You are the cheese to my mac, the eggs to my bacon...*

There are some things in life that just naturally go together: Mac 'n Cheese, Peantbutter and Chocolate, Shoes and Laces.  You get where I'm going with this.  They are just two great tastes that taste great together, right?  But perfect pairing isn't simply relegated to food.  For example, I am fluent in sarcasm AND I love to write, ergo... a blog! I have a friend who is super crafty and even more friendly.  So... she makes some extra cash selling her crafty items at craft fairs because people are just drawn to her sweet personality.  I have family member who is an exceptional seamstress.  She uses her talent not only to create beautiful things for her own family but teaches others to do the same.

But what if you are not one of the lucky ones? What if what you love or the gifts you possess are not compatible? What if they don't go together like ramma lamma lamma ka dinga da dinga dong? For example, what if my sewy friend also loved riding a unicycle? Well, I guess that's not a good example since we learned from this post that you can pretty much macrame anything, right? She could put her talents to good use by sewing a unicycle seat cover. But what if my crafty friend loved wine? Sure, she could use reclaimed wood to create a fabulous wine rack or something.  But using sharp objects while enjoying some wine is not exactly the best idea.  What if you were someone who loved candle making and skydiving? Those definitely don't go together.  Or what if you were an avid gamer and horseback rider? Sure you could design your well-endowed avatar seated on a horse, but it's definitely not wise to try and handle your DS and the reigns simultaneously.  Worse yet, what if you loved chicken and bondage? 

Wait, what? Chicken and bondage? In what alternate universe would those two things be compatible?Surprisingly, I discovered this week that if you like a little pain with your poultry you're in luck!

May I present...

If you're looking for a little kink in the kitchen, the brilliant FL Fowler (a pseudonym of course) has taken your beloved Fifty, thrown in a bit of fowl and voila! You have "Fifty Shades of Chicken." Are you ready to Dominate Dinner? 

Now for those of you who are new to the scene, Fowler gently eases you in...

Everyone needs to walk before they can run, so vanilla is a great place to start. 

Chocolate syrup with whipped cream comes later...

Just look at the cheeky chicken all bound and ready to be devoured. 

Um, I've never seen this guy on the Food Network.

I ABSolutely need cooking lessons from him.

Eventually, however, it's time for the bird to leave the nest and venture out into 

the big, scary world of extreme cooking...

Oooooo, someone has been a little naughty!

Talk about being too "tied up in the kitchen" to socialize with the guests.

Not sure if this a reference to the chicken or the chef...? 

I'm pretty sure this was filmed over Spring Break in Florida 

and you can find it on Pay Per View

Um, not even going to go there.

I think I need a sous chef.

But even the hottest hash-slinger needs a bit of romancing now and again, right? 

And whether it be in the kitchen or the playroom, we're all just looking for a happy ending.

I hate cooking but this might whip me into shape...

That's just my normal.

*There is definitely some colorful language in Fowler's book.  But if you love you some Fifty or love a good parody, you have GOT to read this book! Oh, and the recipes aren't half bad either;)